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agonizing

/ˈæɡ.ə.naɪ.zɪŋ/ noun C2
  1. The act of one who agonizes.

Plural agonizings

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It is thus that a wounded man trembles instinctively at the approach of the finger to his wound until it be healed, but Villefort’s was one of those that never close, or if they do, only close to reopen more agonizing than ever.
The Count of Monte Cristo, p. 85 · C1
It is a wretched, damp, nay, even horrible spot, more especially when we consider the agonizing conferences which have taken place between those iron bars.
The Count of Monte Cristo, p. 1036 · C1
By choosing the comforting predictability of household chores, I was effectively shielding myself from the agonizing fear of failure.
The Emotional Roots of Procrastination, p. 1 · C1
As their crops withered and their livelihoods vanished beneath the drifting dunes, countless families faced an agonizing decision regarding their future.
The Dust Bowl: An Ecological Catastrophe, p. 1 · C1

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Words, meanings, pronunciations and translations from Wiktionary (CC BY-SA 4.0); how common each word is from wordfreq. Made into this dictionary by FluentPlex.